A prayer of an afflicted man. When he is faint and pours out his lament before the LORD.

Photography by Mercy Susanna

Hear my prayer, O LORD; let my cry for help come to you. Do not hide your face from me when I am in distress. Turn your ear to me; when I call, answer me quickly. For my days vanish like smoke; my bones burn like glowing embers. My heart is blighted and withered like grass; I forgot to eat my food. Because of my loud groaning I am reduced to skin and bones. I am like a desert owl, like an owl among the ruins. I lie awake; I have become like a bird alone on a roof. All day long my enemies taunt me; those who rail against me use my name as a curse. For I eat ashes as my food and mingle my drink with tears because of your great wrath, for you have taken me up and thrown me aside. My days are like evening shadow; I wither away like grass. 

But you, O LORD, sit enthroned forever; your renown endures through all generations. You will arise and have compassion on Zion, for it is time to show favor to her; the appointed time has come. For her stones are dear to your servants; her very dust moves them to pity. The nations will fear the name of the LORD, all the kings of the earth will revere your glory. He will respond to the prayer of the destitute; he will not despise their plea. Let this be written for future generation, that a people not yet created may praise the LORD: "The LORD looked down from his sanctuary on high, from heaven he viewed the earth, to hear the groans of the prisoners and released those condemned to death."

So the name of the LORD will be declared in Zion and his praise in Jerusalem when the peoples and the kingdoms assemble to worship the LORD. In course of my life he broke my strength; he cut short my days. So I said: 

"Do not take me away, O my God, in the midst of my days; your years go on through all generations. In the beginning you laid the foundations of the earth, and the heavens are the work of your hands.

They will perish, but you remain; they will all wear out like a garment. Like clothing you will change them and they will be discarded. But you remain the same, and your years will never end. The children of your servants will live in your presence;  their descendants will be established before you."

Psalm 102

The Appointment!

Why are you downcast,O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. Psalm 42-11

It's been one long month that I haven't thought anything to pen down. How does that feel for someone who is called to do so? A lazy workman? Or an unfaithful being? Or a reluctant sloth? Every day I wake up to an annoying alarm ringing in my ears. I plan the busy schedule and set out for the daily business. And then come back, stare at the ceiling, connecting dots when I shut my eyes and the day ends. Every day, the same, feeling nothing inside, except empty. One fine day I realized that I had stopped reacting to situations, even to the complex ones. May it be gloomy or happy,I just stopped. Writers feel numb sometimes. It makes me feel so inconvenient that I knew not what to write. There may be these two cases that I think I have observed. It might me that, I have many things on my mind that I can't put down anything or, this case that I have absolutely nothing, except the fading background. The way I get experienced is way too unusual. Being exposed to the smoke of the traffic, books, cultures, colors, literature, nature, food, and the gravity of the big planet, drives me to the desk I long to sit at. And pull out the big blue diary to pour out the anxiety, frustration, delight, humor, praise, huh, what not. At the end of the day, the flavors combine to form a tinge of essence which helps me find the purpose of life to know exactly what it really means. I have learned that I'd be stable when I write at least two lines of praise on my daily basis. Maybe, that's my appointment to pour it all out. It might be dramatic but it's true that writers need solace, rather I wish to say, writing is the solace. At least for me. :)